By Amy J. Fillmore – Author and blogger
We’ve all seen those totally mismatched couples that have made us think, “How on earth did he get her? This dude is really not star-status in the looks department, but his woman is a total 10. Is it his personality? Is he super kind? Rich?”
Women know the answer.
That guy is giving his woman mind-blowing orgasms every day. He’s a total rockstar in bed. Shallow observations of men rate them on attractiveness or intelligence, but it’s serious pussy eating skills that separate the men from the boys.
The female orgasm is admittedly a bit mysterious. As opposed to men, who cum in a fairly straightforward manner, women can experience a wide variety of orgasms.
In fact, there are so many different ways that women can orgasm, that you may not even know all that she’s capable of.
Most women orgasm through clitoral stimulation, but can also have:
- Vaginal orgasms
- Gushing wet g-spot orgasms
- Blended orgasms
- And most importantly… Multiple orgasms
Go for the multiple orgasms, guys. You can never go wrong with a bunch of orgasms.
During sexual arousal a woman’s body undergoes some changes. The clitoris, inner lips, and the entire pelvic area swell and becomes engorged with blood.
Stages of clitoris arousal
The clitoris may stick out a little further from under the clitoral hood, as seen in the picture above, though this varies greatly from woman to woman.
Various muscles throughout the vagina, as well as the rest of the body, are going to contract and tighten as orgasm draws nears. Orgasm is the point when all of this pressure releases by a series of involuntary muscle contractions throughout the vagina, uterus and anus.
Yes, and the anus! “Two in the pink and one in the stink,” is a very wise proverb that shouldn’t be taken lightly.
Women describe the sensation of orgasming as an all-over feeling of lightness in the body that culminates in a strong blissful and tingly feelings in the clitoris.
Sometimes, the female orgasm can be so incredibly powerful that women can experience temporarily blurred vision, or numb sensations in their toes. Some women may scream out uncontrollably, while others remain silently transfixed on their pleasure.
All of this will vary from woman to woman, but it will also vary from orgasm to orgasm. Women are capable of a wide range of orgasms, so stay open to all the possibilities that lie ahead.
On a more serious note, female orgasm has been shown to increase blood flow to the brain, while also reducing sensitivity to pain and anxiety. Orgasms release endorphins and endorphins are a lot like natural morphine. Thus, we can deduce that orgasms are a bit like drugs. Afterall, they are quite addictive.
By giving your lady a hearty helping of orgasms on the regular, you’re helping her to stay happy and healthy. And for those of you in relationships, you’re going to get closer to your partner than ever by blowing her mind with frequent intense orgasms.
Who has time to argue when they’re orgasming all the time? That’s right, no one.
Whether you’re a man or a women, having an orgasm feels awesome. However, there are some noticeable differences between the sexes. The most important difference is that many women have the ability to orgasm multiple times.
As you already know, once you’ve orgasmed, you most likely need some downtime before you’re ready to go again. Many men may even find themselves completely knocked out after an orgasm and will fall right off to sleep. That’s because during ejaculation, the male brain secretes a cocktail of chemicals, which may make them more prone to sleepiness.
Women, on the other hand, are really just getting started with orgasm number one. This is why it’s vitally important for you to hold off on your own orgasm until your female partner has had at least one orgasm of her own.
Once you know exactly what makes your partner tick and you’re able to bring her to orgasm, you won’t want to stop with just one. Real rockstars in bed are able to make their partner orgasm over and over (and over) again.
The many beautiful O-faces
Stave off those feelings of weariness and either finger her, or lick her for as long as it takes to bring her to orgasm. If you came super early, it might take a while to get her off.
Your fingers may feel like they’ve reached their limits. Your mouth may go completely numb. But, you keep going and act like you’re totally into it. She won’t be able to cum if you’re acting like you’re not thoroughly enjoying the experience of satisfying her.
Read her mind
The first thing that you need to understand about the female orgasm, is that women need to feel relaxed in order to have one. The process of orgasming for women is incredibly mental. For men, visuals are the key. Guys like to watch porn, or see tits.
Women like to feel both physically and mentally safe and relaxed. Try dimming the lighting and playing it cool. One surefire way to get your woman out of her relaxation zone is to ask every few minutes, “Are you close? Did you cum yet?” Eeks!
Women also tend to zone out a bit when they’re starting to reach climax. So, if your partner wants to share a sexual fantasy, go with it. Many women fantasize in their minds when they’re getting ready to reach the Big-O as a way to mentally relax and get them over the edge into orgasm-land.
One study actually found that women who have more erotic thoughts during sex are more frequently able to reach orgasm.
So, help your lady friend out and talk a little dirty talk to her. No, don’t go full blown porno on her. Many women do not respond well to being called dirty little sluts (whereas some do!). Instead, focus on dirty talk that will make her feel hot and sexy.
Say things like, “Mmmm I am going to make you feel so fucking good. How many times do you want to cum, baby? Fuck, you’re so wet and juicy. I’m going to eat you for hours.”
Professor Alan Riley, a well-known sexpert, says that sexuality for women may be more emotionally driven than experts had previously thought.
“There’s been a lot of focus on the body and our physical responses,” Dr. Riley said, “but for many people, and women in particular, the mind plays an even more important role.”
“I can actually mentally give myself an orgasm. You know, sense memory is quite powerful.” -Lady Gaga
The one and only Lady Gaga
You may be surprised to hear that there are women who can orgasm by thinking alone. That’s right, some women don’t even need to be physically stimulated in order to reach orgasm.
Lady Gaga once told New York Magazine in an interview, “I don’t know if this is too much for your magazine, but I can actually mentally give myself an orgasm. You know, sense memory is quite powerful.”
So, if some women can orgasm without being touched, you can definitely give your partner mind-blowing orgasms with touch. With the female body, the sky is the limit.
Therefore, if your partner isn’t able to climax, this doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re totally unskilled in the sex department.
Communication is key. Ask your partner how she typically orgasms and if you find out that she’s always had a problem, you may want to seek medical advice, as she could have thyroid disease, depression, diabetes, or FSD (female sexual dysfunction).
See the signs
Types of orgasms
Clitoral Orgasm
Most women orgasm through clitoral stimulation. This means that fingering or going down on your woman can really be the secret sauce to getting her off.
With a clitoral orgasm, intense feelings of pleasure culminate and spread from the clitoris throughout the pelvic region and sometimes throughout the entire body.
To give a woman a clitoral orgasm, you could go down on her, finger her, or use a vibrator. Hell, you could even rub your hard cock up against her clit really fast and make her cum.
You’re going to find that some women prefer light pressure on their clitoris, whereas others will be into stronger motions. Additionally, some women prefer to be stroked through their clitoral hood, while others are less sensitive and more open to direct clit touching.
Every woman is different, so ask her what makes her cum the best so that you can do it exactly the way she likes it.
Many women can achieve a clitoral orgasm with a couple of minutes if they’re touching themselves. Men who are experienced in the field can also achieve similarly fast results once they know just what types of touch their partner needs.
But why just stop with one clitoral orgasm? Many women can have multiple orgasms, so why not giver her a few clitoral orgasms with your fingers, then move south with your tongue for a few more? Then, you can move on to some vaginal orgasms during intercourse and maybe a blended orgasm for the grand finale. Yes, this is totally possible.
A vaginal orgasm begins in the vagina and spreads throughout the pelvic region and the body. Some women say that vaginal orgasms can feel more all-encompassing than clitoral orgasms, though less intense. Of course, this all depends on the person.
Whereas a clitoral orgasm can get going in as fast as a minute, a vaginal orgasm will take more time to build up. Some women take 20-25 minutes to achieve a vaginal orgasm, so be prepared to take your time to get her pussy off.
Of course, the famous g-spot orgasm is also a type of vaginal orgasm. G-spot orgasms are what get those notorious squirters squirting. A g-spot orgasm can make a woman’s body shake all over with super intense pleasure. And some women have such powerful sensations of total euphoria from these types of orgasms, that they have almost out of body type experiences.
So, if you’re into making women gush, you’ll want to perfect this method.
Whether you’re using your fingers, your dick, or a vibrator, it will still take up to 25 minutes to make your girl squirt.
The g-spot is located just behind the belly button, so in order to hit it you’ll have to arch your fingers inside at just the right angle. Additionally, using pillows under her bum and some planned positioning can get her in the right angle so that your dick can also hit her g-spot.
More on making her squirt in later chapters.
Anal Orgasm
Scary anal porn has spread a lot of fear and misinformation about the act to both men and women. But, if you take proper care to clean the area, you’re not going to hit shit—don’t worry. In fact, one report showed that 94% of women who engaged in anal sex reached orgasm.
This is a way higher percentage than for vaginal sex or oral sex. So, if your partner is down, you should definitely make her orgasm through anal sex.
Ok, orgasming anally isn’t really an anal orgasm. Actually, you’re stimulating the g-spot and other vaginal nerves through the internal wall between the butthole and the pussy. But many women still have incredibly powerful orgasms with anal sex, or with anal sex and a combination of clitoral stimulation.
Blended Orgasm
Multiple Orgasms
Coming up: The female anatomy
In the next chapter you’ll be astonished to learn just how many different components are involved in female anatomy. Once you know what you’re working with, you’ll know even better how to work it.